Howlin' Hockey
Fansided

Daily Haterade: Tom Wilson

By Catherine Silverman

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Has John Stamos ever even been to the desert? Do we know if his hair can handle it?

So I don’t know what it is about the Washington Capitals and their newfound obsession with vanity queens, but this is the second player we’ve chosen to target who thinks he’s too beautiful to handle.

Uncle Jesse

Tom Wilson has arrived in Arizona, and he seems to be digging it. This photo was posted to both Liam O’Brien and Michael Latta’s Instagram accounts, and it gives me faith that the Coyotes are going to win by a lot tonight:

I take back the Uncle Jesse comments; clearly Tom Wilson thinks he’s Miley Cyrus. Anywho.

20-year-old Wilson has really burst on the scene for the Caps this season, wowing head coach Barry Trotz with his gritty, get-under-your-skin style of play and the way he sticks up for himself.

"“I need more people to help Tom Wilson instead of him sticking up for everybody else,” Trotz said, per the Washington Post. “They started coming after for him, and I need more of our guys to stick up for him.”"

So now this scrappy right wing is apparently Trotz’s pet, because we needed more to make fun of him for.

With only three goals and seven assists in his entire rookie season, Wilson was the last player fans expected to see taking center stage so soon — but he’s already notched a goal and two assists in his first seven games, and it looks like he’s come back from an early season injury (and some harsh words for his goon-ish behavior) stronger than ever.

He’s also the self-appointed personal guard for Nicklas Backstrom and Alex Ovechkin. God help you if you go after either of them, as if going after Alex Ovechkin wasn’t already basically a death with.

This first round pick from 2012 had both his lone goal and one of his two assists against Arizona when they played the Caps in D.C. earlier this month, so expect this kid to come back as strong as ever. He also spent four minutes in the sin bin and got into a bit of a scuffle with BJ Crombeen, so that’s always nice.

I know he’s about to become the most beloved player, like, EVER for fourteen-year-old hockey fans all over the DMV, but here in the Desert? Tom Wilson? Yeah. We kinda hate him.

God help the Washington Capitals.

*bonus — I know they’re in different conferences and all, but can we stop to imagine the kind of rivalry that could heat up between Max Domi and this kid?

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